“If You’re Flammable And Have Legs, You Are Never Blocking A Fire Exit.”

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My dear,

I was at this casino minding my own business, and this guy came up to me and said, “You’re gonna have to move, you’re blocking a fire exit.” As though if there was a fire, I wasn’t gonna run. If you’re flammable and have legs, you are never blocking a fire exit.

I did see a legless man once though. Man, I hope he can do really good hand-stands.

Falsely yours,
Mitchell Lee “Mitch” Hedberg

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1. “To Burn Out You Must First Be On Fire.”
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